Mercedes-Benz G63 Brabus G700 

This is a military vehicle that's been to finishing school and emerged with a taste for caviar and Champagne. Brabus has taken Mercedes' already insane G63 AMG and cranked the upgrade dial to eleven, creating a beast that can conquer any terrain. 

Under the bonnet, Brabus has fitted in a 700 horsepower and 950 NM of torque power unit. This means that this brick-shaped luxury SUV will hurtle from zero to 60 mph in just 4.3 seconds - faster than many sports cars and definitely faster than anything with this much presence has any right to go.

The interior is a luxurious mix of carbon fiber, Alcantara, and leather so supple it probably costs more per square foot than real estate in some places. Every surface has been touched by Brabus craftsmen who clearly believe subtlety is a character flaw. The ride quality somehow manages to be both cushy enough for royalty and firm enough for serious off-road work.

This machine will climb mountains, ford rivers, and still deliver you to the opera looking like you own the building. It's absolutely magnificent.